Wedding Planner

Wondering About Wedding Etiquette?


Emily Post is often our go-to when it comes to ‘I do’ dilemmas. Her book Wedding Etiquette (updated by her etiquette-savvy great-great granddaughters Lizzie and Anna) is a treasure trove of wedding wisdom….

On Who Pays

“When families are wiling to share the costs, the bride and groom should agree on their wedding priorities and how they would  allocate the funds ahead of time before sitting down with their parents to discuss the budget. If they accept financial help they should be willing to compromise on some of their wishes for the wedding.”

When Not to Use Email or Social Media

“Emailing a wedding invitation, even to your closest friend or relative, generally is not appropriate. The wedding invitation serves to set the tone for the ceremony and reception to come in a way an email just can’t. Pinned on refrigerators or tucked on mantels, they also act as reminders and build anticipation.”

Wedding of Lauren and Jarrod. Van Middleton Photography

Wedding of Lauren and Jarrad. Van Middleton Photography

On Choosing Bridesmaid Gowns

“Because attendants generally pay for their own dresses and accessories, brides should be respectful when considering the costs of their outfits… it is perfectly fine for your bridesmaids to each wear different dresses, but most brides choose a variation on a theme: all dresses in the same shade or fabric, with the style up to each bridesmaid, or a universal choice of colour.”

On a Device Free Ceremony

“As to guests, there are a few simple ways to remind them that’s time to stop texting or playing ‘Words with Friends’ and give their full attention to the ceremony. You might post a “Please turn off all mobile devices” sign at the entrance or by the guest book. If you are providing programs, you can add it there – most guests read the program cover to cover while they wait. If you don’t think that any of those will do the trick, ask one of the groomsmen to make an announcement just before the couple’s parents are seated and the ceremony begins.”

On Cutting The Cake First

“In bygone eras, guests waited for the bride and groom to make their grand departure before leaving. Today, cutting the cake is the signal that guests may take their leave. However, it’s much more likely that the bridal couple will see their elderly guests off and then continue the celebration. As a courtesy to elderly guests an those with young children, consider cutting the cake earlier in the reception so that guests are free to leave when they are ready.”

For more wedding wisdom, pick up a copy of Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette. RRP$42.99

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